Diary 4: What I am working on this week
This has been a rough week, hence not writing on Monday. There are many reasons for not writing on Monday, including not knowing what to write about. I have some things I'd like to write about, but I haven't had the headspace to do it. This is a rundown of what I've been working on this week or thinking about working on. I will work up from the small things and finish with a bang.

Playing with Grammarly
Maybe this isn't the slightest change, but it's big for me. Last week, the Academic Publisher reviewed my editing and pointed out some things I've been missing. I was a bit upset because editing is brutal, and I tend to take these things personally. I decided I could use help. Up until now, I've used the Word editor to assist. It picks out the fundamental problems, like spelling and grammar, but only the simplest grammatical mistakes.
I made a decision. I downloaded Grammarly.

Here's an odd story. When Grammarly started, they approached me about ten to twelve years ago to do a sponsorship deal. I kept a blog, so perhaps they thought I was an expert or had a lot of Klout.
I didn't.
At the time, I also felt weird about using it. I didn't believe a computer-generated tool could understand English. I'd spent the '00s switching off Clippy, and I thought Grammarly was much the same thing.
Ten years later, I am writing on the Grammarly app, accepting its suggestions. I even talk to it while I'm editing.
It's my little work buddy.
I can now write a post about working with the Grammarly tool.
The Snowflake Method
I thought I was done buying "how to write a novel" books. Nope. I have a story about how I ignored the Snowflake Method and returned to it.
This story involves another writing tool, three disasters, and a video about reindeer herding.
I can now also write a post about working with this writing tool and the Snowflake Method.
Unmasking Myself
This is the big one. The important one. I frequently drop in references to being autistic, the diagnosis, and what it means for me. What I haven't done is emphasise the diagnosis and what it means to me.
I even wanted to start a blog/newsletter/Medium publication exclusively about being autistic. Especially having been diagnosed at 43, which is late by almost any standard.
I need to do that.
I'm scared of doing that.

The last post swimming around in my head is about being autistic. It's about what it took to get a diagnosis and the roller-coaster ride I've been on since then.
What's Holding Me Back
I'm on a Struggle Bus. I have too many things to do, and I have task inertia about all of them. I have my Ph.D. thesis to edit and submit. I have Amnar plucking away at the inside of my head, demanding my attention.
I have academic papers to edit. Let's not forget that.

I haven't figured out how to do all these things, and figuring that out is a job in and of itself. This is a start, however. The tiniest possible opening, but it is a start.
Right Now
Today I'm not editing, and I'm going to give blood in town. Before I do that, I'm finally going to set up the Medium publication about being autistic. Once I've done that, I'll link to it here and make sure all the posts I write there are also available to read without needing a Medium subscription.
Finally, finally, I'm going to unmask myself.
